Jonathan Crocker

Santa Claus Conquers The Martians (voted one of the worst movies ever). Mission To Mars (Rolling Stone: “DePalma has never made a dull movie. Until now.”). Red Planet (Variety: “Mission To Mars had style to burn compared to Red Planet”). Ghosts Of Mars (killed John Carpenter’s career for nine years). Doom (one of Time magazine’s 10 Worst Ever Videogame Adaps). Mars Attacks! (Budget: $100m. US box-office: $38m). Mars Needs Moms (the biggest box-office bomb of all time).

If history has taught us one lesson, it’s that if you’re going to make a movie about Mars, it had better star Arnold Schwarzenegger and a lady with three boobies. Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 1% [?]

You might have heard about it already, but there’s some sort of international football tournament being played in South Africa this month. To celebrate England’s impending victory in the World Cup, we could have given you a list of the greatest football movies ever. But we’re better than that. So here, lacing up their boots in dreamland, are the movie characters who’d make our starting eleven. Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 12% [?]

What’s this talk that you wanted Big Daddy to be a paedophile?

This is bollocks, right. Where did this come from? Did Vaughn say this? He actually just doing this to piss me off! I never said that. What I suggested was I wanted Big Daddy to have a twist to it that wasn’t just as simple as him being a cop. One of the things I suggested was that he maybe kidnapped Cindy. But Vaughn has somehow turned that into making him a paedo. Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 7% [?]

1. Piranha Part Two: The Spawning (1981)

“I was hired by a very unscrupulous producer. He put me with an Italian crew who spoke no English, then fired me a couple of weeks into the shoot and took over directing. Turns out, he’d done that on his two previous films. He wouldn’t show me a foot of film that I’d shot, so I went in and ran the film for myself. I made a few changes – I don’t know if the editor ever noticed – and it was fine. So I thought, ‘I actually can do this. I just fell in with a pack of thieves and whackos.’ Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 9% [?]

“I walked out of The Matrix and I was thinking, ‘What kind of science fiction movie can people make now?’” recalls Darren Aronofsky. “The Wachowskis took all the great sci-fi ideas of the 20th century and rolled them into a delicious pop culture sandwich that everyone on the planet devoured.” To celebrate the 10-year anniversary of the most influential movie in modern sci-fi, we reveal the 12 movies and books that inspired it. Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 15% [?]

Before the loin-clothed Neanderthal orphan and the Uzi-loving cybernetic organism, Arnold Schwarzenegger scored one of the most influential acting roles of his career: himself. What makes cult ‘70s bodybuilding documentary Pumping Iron such an interesting bridge between Arnie’s pro Adonis years and his birth as a big-screen anti-hero is the fact that it isn’t a documentary at all. Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 30% [?]

Exploring Watchmen’s 20-year journey to the big screen…

Forget what you know about the world. It’s 1986. America has won the Vietnam war. Nixon has been elected for a third time as US president. The world has a superhero with limitless power over space and time. Costumed vigilantes have been part of society for the last 50 years.

Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 16% [?]